Why not use this Christmas to discover the intergenerational patterns innocently passed down from your parents that you want to end with you? The science lab of the holiday dinner table is rich with opportunity to witness those pesky old “traditions” that keep everyone playing their expected roles of victim, perpetrator, martyr, drunk comedian, co-dependent, avoidant, racist, activist, doormat, workaholic, etc. I mean that can be fun too, your choice.
If you found this blog you may be suffering from acute heartbreak of a soulmate love gone awry. I get it. It hurts like hell. Treat it with reverence. You are currently in the process of updating your inner operating system. Think of this pain like the growing pains of your tween years that attacked your shins, but instead these are the growing pains of the mind. The ‘you’ you have been until this moment has served you well and now there is a new you emerging. Some call it spiritual growth, initiation, or transformation. Call it whatever you want. Right now you are being asked to harness this life moment for your greatest healing, learning, and expansion. Pain is not your enemy. Pain is the spaceship you are boarding to explore the wide expanse of your inner universe—why you choose who you choose in love, and what love actually is. If your heart is being broken, let it break wide open. Pain, when truly surrendered to, will guide you home. You don’t have to believe me now. Just wait. Here are a few steps that worked for me.
I first learned about the notion of non-duality from a friend who always seemed to have her life together. She is one of those glowing women on her purpose, married to a dreamy guy, makes plenty of money, and radiates loving energy. She just seems free. “How do you do it?” I would ask. She would smile this knowing smile and say something about how it’s not just about doing, it was about being. “Huh?” I would shrug in response and go back to doing.